And some people think this list is just a joke....

It's my life....

You look at a cardboard box and recognize its coffin potential.

You go out to a club and when the black light comes on, you check yourself for ringworm.

You can eat lunch while cleaning up a Parvo blowout.

You keep your milkshake frozen in the freezer next to the dead dogs.

After seeing what goes into the washing machine at work, your own laundry doesn't seem so dirty.

Your work clothes look just like your pajamas.

You open your lunch container and find a spleen.

All of your pets are either 3 legged, lame, or blind in one eye.

You've done an anal probe on a bird.

You can detect maggots at 100 paces just by the smell.

You find a hair in your food, pull it out, and keep on eating.
Pets are more recognizable than their owners.
The first thing you wonder when opening up a big cat abscess is, "Where are the Ritz crackers?"

You cough up hairballs.

You're the first one in the hospital and don't notice the smell.

You start to like the smell of anal glands.

You can play connect the dots with all your scars and puncture wounds.

Normal people won't eat meals with you.

You get the flu and begin to sympathize with the Parvo dog.

Your paycheck barely covers your food bill.

You've ever picked up dog poop with your bare hands.

You can put a muzzle on with one hand.

You know the term, "pink juice" doesn't mean Kool-Aid.

You get a rash just from LOOKING at a Shar-Pei.

You can take a dog's rectal temperature without looking.

You have cat hair all over your car, but don't own a cat.

You believe in the aerial spraying of Acepromazine.

You think that a temperature of 102 is normal...for a human.

You've ever run out of towels, syringes, IV fluids, meds and patience all at the same time.

You believe the best patients are SIR...Sedated, Intubated and Restrained.

You no longer have a gag reflex.

When the vet asks, "What color is the patient's diarrhea?" , you show him your shoes.

Half your wardrobe has bloodstains on it, and the other half has holes bitten/scratched/torn though it.

You believe all bleeding stops.....eventually.

You see someone's child throwing a fit and think it's nothing that a serious dose of Ket/Val wouldn't cure.

You've ever 'bare-handed' a mess.

Lint rollers are on your shopping list every week.

You carry dog treats in your pockets or purse at all times. (even more so if you don't actually own a dog)

When you go out to eat and find a hair in your food you don't even THINK of telling the waiter, because you're pretty sure the hair came off your clothes.

Everyone, including complete strangers, tells you about each and every little problem their pet has.

All your magazine subscriptions have animals on the cover.

You hear the word 'bitch' and automatically think intact female canine, rather than rude woman.

You can smell Parvo from 200 meters.

You think a good way to handle the obnoxious drunk that's hitting on you is with a catch pole and muzzle.

You say at least once a day, "What am I doing here?", but know that you wouldn't trade it for anything.